So, I’m doing it again. It’s 2:30am and I’m still up doing a really simple assignment that I just can’t seem to focus on. I officially suck at this school thing now.
I’m really sick of school now. It’s very obvious when writing a presentation on weakness of will and yet displaying that same characteristic. The glaring criticisms in this essay are still not enough to motivate me.
After several failed attempts over the last few days of turning this into some semblance of a coherent presentation, I’m finally getting somewhere but it is slow going. I’ve been sitting here for the last three hours trying to get a handout together for the morning. It’s at the halfway point and I’m really getting tempted to just go to sleep. At first I wasn’t sure that Hill had it right that you feel shame when you realize your will is weak, but right now I’m ashamed that rather than doing my best I just want sleep.
I’ve emailed WPL and told them that I won’t be coming in tomorrow (I’ll most likely be sleeping in preparation for class or still trying to finish this thing) and am so scatterbrained at the moment that pretty much anything is a distraction.
What makes it worse is I know that I probably would have had this done days ago if I wasn’t so preoccupied with WLUSP stuff. Lately there have been a lot of updates to WordPress and I’ve been upgrading all the sites and trying to keep on top of all the plugins and necessary theme changes. Mix that with creating a hiring website, a lot of customizations to the other to get the Pages feature to behave like the regular blog posts and a main page that just won’t behave no matter what lengths I go to and you have one frustrated and distracted gal.
That’s pretty much what I’ve been doing since Friday morning, with my sporadic attempts at a presentation in the interim. I might have missed my academic counselling appointment on Friday as well, though part of me thinks it might be this coming Friday I doubt I’ll be that lucky. I guess tomorrow before my presentation I’ll find out about that and see what I can do.
There’s still three essays, a take-home exam, and a final to get through before this is over. I hope I don’t have a meltdown before I get there.